The relationship between a father and son typically begins with love, but as time goes on, it could get complicated. You look around and see so many examples of Father - Daughter duos and Mother - Son Duos and wonder why. Whatever the reasons, we are here remind you why it is important for Dads to have strong bonds with their boys and also give some simple tips how to build these bonds.
Why Have Father- Son Bonds
Strong fathers make strong sons and vice versa. In a situation where a boy doesn’t get the fatherly love he needs, the child might find it hard fitting in with his peers, have trouble with girls, or be generally unhappy and ill adjusted. All a boy need is masculine guidance from his father and the father-son bond impacts the kind of man a boy develops into. Your son needs someone to teach him how to be a gentleman, how to respect women, how to take ownership, how to be a leader. Your son’s childhood should be filled with loveable moments with his father and not constant arguments and fights.
Here are a few things you could do to keep a strong relationship with your son
Be more involved: although, you might have created that gap of not being present and your son resists telling you things or spending time with you. Either way, you don’t want to be in his space all the time or force things. Being present doesn’t mean staying home all day but being at functions that are important to him. Attend his school functions, sports activities, pick him up from school, be present at his first award. Your presence has the power to inspire him to do better and every child wants their parent to be proud of them. Likewise, your participation in various structured experiences can create more opportunities for you and your son to get closer.
Realize that You Influence Him
Your son looks up to you, you are his role model therefore, you need to lead by example. You can’t treat his mother badly and expect him to be happy. What you say, how you behave, how you treat others have a great influence on his behavior.
Do Not Force Face-to-Face Conversation
Be patient with him, shouting and nagging wouldn’t help matters. If he isn’t ready to talk, do not force a conversation. Instead, let him know you are always available if he needs someone to talk to about anything
Participate in father-son activities
A mother cannot always withstand the energy of her son, the rough play, his voracious appetite, and his interests. Engage in wrestling, gyming, video games, tree climbing and several outdoor adventures you could explore. Kids are more energized when they are younger and you could develop special bonds when you do these things together.
Do Not Be Afraid of the Necessary Conversations
That’s why he has a father, someone to guide him through manhood. This includes teaching sex education, the guy code, relationships and hygiene. Most parents shy away from having these conversations with their kids and expect them to learn from school. Listen, you can’t control the kind of friends they meet at school or the amount of information they get, Be the different parent, stop thinking it’s awkward talking about these things, they will still know anyway so why be shy?
Set Some Boundaries
Even though you want to play games with your son or you want to be that cool dad he can always relate with, make sure there are limits. Overstepping boundaries would cause disrespect and this could negatively affect your relationship rather than improve it because you didn’t start early enough. Disrespect could also stem from complaining too much, comparing him with his friends or constant disapproval of the things he asks for. State the rules, give punishments when necessary, guide him to doing the right things and support him when he shows interest in something.
Calmly Confront their Mistakes
Kids can be very annoying with the mistakes they make and the harm they cause. You might get furious and start screaming before you hear their side of the story. Boys can be extremely stubborn at times and they need firm hands. Explain why you are disappointed and let him promise never to do it again.
As a father- son Duo, you may have several things to deal with. Amidst all that, you must make time to be with each other and communicate. If you’re having trouble connecting, try some of the ways that we have mentioned above. Get to know each other better. And never take each other for granted, because this time together is limited. So, try to make the best of it.