Mean kids are everywhere, and bullying can happen anytime either in school, at work or in your neighborhood. Bullying can occur in different forms including physical (chasing, pinching, meeting at secluded areas, scaring and extortion), verbal (name-calling, teasing, threatening, cyberbullying), emotional (such as spreading rumours, implicating or punishing someone less powerful).
No parent wants their child to go through any of these, you can’t control the people they will mingle with outside of your home, neither can you control the extent to which these bullies will go. Just to hurt your child, they can go as far as engaging in physical fights, setting up danger, and before you know it, your child can go into depression, take drugs or land in a hospital.
The best you can do to avoid the situation is raise confident, loving, happy kids so your child can grow up with good self-esteem whilst knowing their self-worth. Either way, your kids won’t be a bully or get bullied by anyone.
When Is It Bullying?
It’s normal for friends and siblings to make fun of each other from time to time or for a fresher to feel sort of new without friends or anyone to talk to in school. This isn’t bullying when the intention is for laughs and everyone was just joking about something very funny that happened in the past. It becomes bullying when this occurs frequently and the same person gets laughed at every day. No one likes to be mocked by their peers, this is what causes low self-esteem! Bullying can lead to suicide or killings, you shouldn’t take it lightly.
Why Do Kids Bully?
Some kids bully because of their stature, they feel they can override every other child that seems timid, shy or physically weaker than them. Some kids bully because of status, let’s say they have rich parents or they’ve been tagged the prettiest in school. Some bully because that’s what they see their parents do; bully their maid, their cleaner, gardener or even their neighbours. Some kids want to be in control and they tend to torment others because that’s the way they’ve been treated or that’s what they see in movies. Some bullies get shunned at home and the only way to get relevance is to trample on other people because that’s what they are used to, so to them, it’s normal.
How To Stop Bullying
Build Your Child’s Confidence
Teach your kids how to love themselves and be proud of themselves. This way, they can have good self-esteem and be less likely to be affected by bullies. Let your kids express themselves in the best way they can, teach them to speak up for themselves, be bold and face their fears. An easy way to do this is by speaking to a mirror or letting them present a school project to everyone in the family. Encourage play, friendship with other kids and social activities that can foster healthy relationships with their peers. When your child shows an interest in an art or skill, do not talk them down because you aren’t really interested. Instead, use lots of words of encouragement that can build their confidence.
Role Play “What If” Scenarios
Let’s say you move into a new neighbourhood and your child is resuming a new school, you might have to prepare manage or prepare them for different experiences their expectations. Being a new student at school can be a good or bad experience. Your classmates might be nice, unfriendly or cold, which is why you need to explain different scenarios of handling different people. Teach to be friendly, social,
If your child has reported a bully to you, teach them how to avoid these people. Ensure you instruct them to sit far away from any bully in class, don’t sit with them during lunch, avoid trouble with them even if they are in a group for a project, make friends with other pupils, don’t go to lonely places alone and ask them to report to a teacher or guardian.
Control Your Temper
Trust me, bullies will frustrate your kids and push them to their limit but it’s always good to keep your anger in check. Your child will be in between defending himself and avoiding fights. Bullies enjoy frustrating their prey and it gets worse when they see that they are not reacting. They thrive on seeing their prey suffer, cry or beg. Instead of fighting back, teach them to keep their cool, don’t say a word back, avoid getting into trouble, make friends that can protect you.
Sometimes, no matter how much you avoid these bullies, they just end up doing more. Should in case, you’ve taught your kid how to avoid the bullies and they persist, visit the school authority, report the bully. You can also demand your child’s class be changed or you withdraw your child from the school or neighbourhood if health or wellbeing has been threatened.
Take Your Child’s Side
You shouldn’t blame your child for being a certain way or being at a place. Try to listen to their side of the story and take action where necessary. If the case requires visiting the school, talking to the bully, meeting the bullys’ parents, do them, just make sure you go any length in making sure our child is safe.
Help Your Child Be A Positive Role Model
Show your child how to love others, treat people with respect and be helpful. If your child is used to seeing you trample on others, they think it’s normal to treat people that way. Most kids that become bullies come from unsettled homes or rural communities where fighting is a norm. Teach your child good values so they don’t become a bully.